Updated: Oct 24, 2022
Busy lifestyles, stress, young families and health problems are just some of the reasons that sensuality and physical intimacy can wane in a relationship. In a long term relationship, it can be easy to begin focusing on the negative things and to stop appreciating the positives. In order to increase the sensuality and physical intimacy in your relationship then we need to start taking time and building up anticipation.
In long term relationships, we often forget to take time and to give time to ourselves and our partner. It’s easy to take a partner and relationship for granted and to rush into physical gymnastics, forgetting that it can be fun to build up to the main event. Anticipation and the excitement of the build-up to spending intimate time with your partner can be key to setting the right mood and unlocking sensuality.
Remember the days when you were first dating your partner; how you would take time of your appearance and how the excitement to see your partner would build up inside you. You would take time over how you looked and take care of yourself so that you could look and feel your best. This self-care routine before dates wouldn’t just be just for the benefit of the person you were meeting, instead, it helped you to feel confident and most importantly allowed you to set aside time to look after yourself and time to reflect on the positive things in a relationship like excitement and self-care. If you don’t practice self-care, how can you expect to extend real care to anyone else? To rekindle the spark in your long term relationship and pep up your love life you must bring that intention to it as well.
Tip for you: form your intention with an affirmation, perhaps your affirmation could be, ‘I am in a loving and secure relationship with a person who loves me as I am’. The affirmation must be personal to you and you must be comfortable with it, play around with this task and create an affirmation that resonates with you and your current circumstances. For example, if you and your partner are lacking physical intimacy then your affirmation may be, ”I will make love with my partner more often”.
The most important thing with making the affirmation is that it is personal and meaningful to you. You have to have a clear intention on what you want to start to attract it. If you keep a journal you may want to write it in your journal and look at it each day or write it on a piece of paper and make a point of looking at it throughout the day.
The point of the affirmation, is to make your intention clear and it is a promise you make to yourself, it will help you focus and keep sight of what you want to achieve.
With your attentions clear and a commitment to taking more time for self-care and time to nourish your relationship you now need to get on with some practical steps.
Space for romance is so important, more important is comfortable and sacred space that is worthy of two lovers uniting. A room clear of clutter, the right lighting, and space all help to create the right ambiance for romance.
Using your senses: Taste and Smell
Instead of just rushing into intercourse, it is important to prepare yourself physically and to build excitement. Use the senses of taste and smell as you explore one another as you lick, kiss, and nibble your way from head to toe. Remember to enjoy giving and receiving and to take time over this without expectation. Breathe deeply throughout this exercise.
Using your senses: Sound
Music they say is the food of love, and it is certain that music can trigger different moods. Be aware of the effect that music can play in setting a scene and switch off distracting canned laughter on the television, the noise of Facebook notifications, your mobile phone, and any other electronic noise-making devices that are not going to contribute to a tranquil ambiance. It is really important to eliminate distractions because it helps you focus on each other. Remember that sounds can be powerful and so don’t be afraid to make noise and be expressive.
Using your senses: Touch
Touch is incredibly important it is one of the most pleasurable senses. Touch is a wonderful way to communicate with your partner and can help to strengthen your connection. Long and relaxed touch with expectation can help with bonding and can help to build sensuality. The brain and body are constantly communicating and when the body is touched in a slow, and gentle way, it sends the message to the brain and releases hormones culminating in happiness.
So, if you feel that your love life is tepid rather than hot, you may want to slow things down and take time to indulge in self-care and invest time in engaging your senses. Building anticipation and setting the scene for romance will spark a better connection which will naturally lead to better intimacy and a stronger bond.
Are you wondering how you can building a better connection and flare that spark? Feel free to contact us and will be more than happy to chat with you about making that a reality for you.